For the leader who carries so much
Hello Reader
I want to share a moment that still makes me pause.
It was my oldest friend’s 40th birthday. A night of laughter, dancing, memories. And I missed it. Not because I didn’t want to be there - but because I was too exhausted to go.
For someone who’s always been a social butterfly, who loves people and celebration, that absence was another huge step in realising I had a problem. A medical problem. I was burnt out.
This was back in 2018 and I had convinced myself that sprinting endlessly in law was normal. That pushing through was the cost of being dependable. Until I realised the cost was showing up somewhere else - in the things and people that mattered most.
I see this in firms all the time now too. High performers, the ones everyone leans on, showing the cracks: shorter in tone, stress written on their faces or withdrawing, the spark fading.
Deloitte tells us poor mental health costs UK employers £51bn a year - and presenteeism is £24bn of that - a huge drain. The people who are “still at their desks” but far from at their best. I'm sure a few names pop into your head from your workforce as you read this. Or do you reflect on yourself, past or present?
Because, here’s the part we often forget, as leaders, we’re not immune.
You’re carrying so much for others. You notice the signs in your people. You fight for the budget. You make the case to partners. But who’s noticing the signs in you?
So here’s my invitation this week - just a reflection, nothing more:
- Where might your people be pushing through at a cost to themselves (and ultimately the team?)
- What support might they need to help them shift their high performance to be more sustainable?
- What would it take to give yourself the same permission you want your people to have?
With warmth,
Vikki x
P.S. If this reflection resonates, you might find it helpful to look at the S.E.R.V.I.C.E Wellbeing Framework the for yourself. It’s the tool I use in 1:1 coaching, the StressLess Academy and Elite Leadership programme to help high performers reset. And if you can already see how valuable it could be for your people, let’s chat about what they need and how I can support them.