How to give a team member feedback
The Situation
I am a lawyer with a team of five. One of the team always sulks when I give them feedback
The Problem
I’m starting to avoid giving them feedback on work I delegate to them and am just making changes myself to get the work out to clients.
The Impact
It’s taking more of my time to review and amend their work, which means;
- unrecoverable fees on their client ledger (so poor recovery rates for their client matters),
- less time on my chargeable work (which is a higher charge out rate so less revenue for the team),
- less of my time on business development and strategy (so reduced clients or future development for the team)
- less opportunity for that lawyer to develop by learning through feedback and doing (reduced future progression and income for that individual and the team)
The Need
To change the team member so that they can take feedback from me!
The Solution
This type of situation is so common when we approach a problem as being ‘out there’.
However, remember we cannot change others but we can change ourselves and through that influence other people’s behaviour through our leadership.
So maybe reflect on the situations where you feel your feedback has resulted in the desired outcome and where it hasn’t. What were the differences in your behaviour?
In those situations consider:
- Was the feedback you gave 1) explicit (another undervalued but highly effective skill to have in your tool-kit!) 2) relevant 3) focused on behaviour; and, above all, 4) heard?
When giving feedback:
- Do you aim to do so with the purpose of encouraging them to do more (or less) of the same?
- Are you reinforcing it with the right rewards or consequences to guide and shape efficient performance, to encourage growth, personal mastery and success?
- Are you providing personal security, reassurance and certainty with your feedback?
When the next opportunity arises to give feedback to your ‘sulky lawyer’(which could be about the sulky behaviour itself!) perhaps first consider :
1) what do you need to achieve from the feedback; more or less of what behaviour? Ie less sulking and more ‘engagement’ when receiving feedback?
2) be explicit! Define what the undesired behaviour and the desired behaviour looks like/ sounds like. (Remember if you don’t really know what you mean, how will the person you’re feeding back to?). Ie “When I give you feedback you tend to look down at your feet, you are mono symbolic in your responses or silent. This behaviour makes me feel uncomfortable because I am reading it as being you don’t care about the feedback. Next time I would like you to be more engaged by asking for clarification on anything you do not understand or agree with.”
3) reinforce your request with rewards or consequences. Think about the individual and what motivates them. It may be their own personal development and the team’s success so the reward and consequence should be tied to that. Ie “Feedback is to enable you to grow and develop to be the best you can be. If our feedback sessions are not more positive it will hinder your development and the team’s progression”.
4) Link the feedback into your vision for the team and the individual’s contribution to that. Ie “As you know my vision for the team is xxx and I see you as an integral part of that by performing at your best and I am here to challenge and support you in doing that”.
5) Continue to give feedback on how they are getting on since this conversation. Put an emphasis on catching them doing something right ie displaying the behaviours you want. But don’t shy away from keeping the boundaries tight when you see the undesirable behaviours. Be assertive when giving feedback and be resilient in yourself to keep giving the feedback continuously and consistently.
Finally, perhaps think about how much training you have had on leading and on the artful (but under valued) skill of giving feedback? In my professional career I was never explicitly taught the skill of giving feedback!
If you would like to find out more about honing your leadership skills then book a FREE 40 minute Discovery Call with me now by visiting the website!
The StressLess Clinic column
This is a monthly column, which is part of the StressLess Clinic that supports leaders in professional practice. I answer a scenario based on real life events so that we can all learn and improve our leadership techniques. All scenarios are anonymised so it’s just coincidence if they remind you of a colleague; we all experience similar issues!
If you’d like to submit a ‘situation’ to be considered and (if you’re the chosen one!) responded to, please do so via the Contact page on my website! Subscribe to the Skylark Post to ensure you get this monthly column and other news delivered directly to your inbox!
